i haven't

been thinking much

lately.

haven't been talking either.

i haven't been able

to find you.

oh don't be a joke

i don't even know you.

maybe work

has made me

insane.

but that can't

really be the case can it?

'cause if it is

then work in the past

must have been torturous.

probably im just bored.

'cause i think

when i finally get to you

it wouldn't feel that

exhilarating anymore.

or maybe

i just need something

to remind me

of an unfinished past.

who cares now?

i think im crazy.

i actually induce heartaches

to get a kick out of it.

i think im really crazy.

but who can tell?

nobody.

why do i even bother?

i really dont know.

maybe i want to win.

maybe

i just can't forget.

or maybe i tend

to remember things more vividly

when they are etched into the heart

rather than memorised by the head.

maybe

im just crazy.

ain't i?

i don't feel satisfied

after writing this entry.

in fact i feel like

i've left out something

which would allow the whole

emotion to flood out.

i think im just crazy.